Although others may trigger our buried emotions, being a stimulus that initiates an emotional reaction in us, they are not the cause of our emotions. The actual cause is us being out of sync with our own needs and our unspoken expectation of them to fulfill our needs.
Words that place the blame on something or someone outside of us leads to the denial of personal responsibility keeping us locked in the victim role. This denial may manifest when we blame our circumstances, our karma, our authorities, our family, or any number of other forces.
"You made me do it." or "Its your fault that I am miserable"
I now take the time to examine my evaluations of others. I consciously adjust my perception by opening my eyes to a wider picture (like putting on a new pair of glasses). This is so much simpler than trying to change the world...
My new book extensively talks on the topic of "blaming and taming".